Sunday, January 20, 2008

16 weeks

So I broke down and went shopping for some maternity clothes today. I have been fighting it a little because I really haven't changed that much and have been getting by with the ol' rubber band through the button hole trick. But with working every day and needing to look somewhat professional, I thought it was time to bite the bullet. It went okay. I was able to find some pants that look like normal people's pants, but oh the tops. I know the style now is those long sort of baby doll tops. Ideal for pregnant women and tiny little girls. Me being a larger gal, I have avoided them like the plague. Why would I look pregnant If I am not? Well now that I am, I tried a few on today and don't really like them any better, but excepted the fact that I always like other people in them and might not look as horrible as I imagine in my head. So if you see me in said top and I do look horrible, please please lie to my face and tell me how great I look. Maternity clothes do have an amazing ability to make you look pregnant though. Prior to this, I haven't felt extremely pregnant looking, but put on a pair of elastic band pants and a top that cinches your fake waist and comes to your knees and look pregnant!

I know I sound horribly insecure, but you must understand. I don't work at an office where I can hide my growing midsection behind a keyboard. I have to stand in front of 100 12 year olds every day, who I have honestly caught starting at my stomach. And who discuss daily this looming event that is birth and how they think I am going to measure up as a mother. It is enough to make anyone feel a little self conscious.

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