So the reality is just starting to set in. We are having a son. It still sounds so strange to say. Up until this point it has just been a little alien who has invaded my body and made me feel sick and kicked me every once and awhile...now it is our son. It is a lot to wrap your mind around. I have been very emotional this last week and a half. Finding out the gender, starting the nursery and turning 27 (tomorrow) has just been a lot to take in. I don't know if you noticed, but I don't do change well. It overwhelms me. When I was a little girl and my mom would rearrange the furniture in my room I would cry until she moved it back. Change is hard for me. That said, this last week or so has been a tough one. Turning a year older, having a child, looking forward to a change in career and life as I know it....scary stuff. I know it will be wonderful and worth it and all the other things people keep telling me, but that doesn't ease the slow and steady panic I feel. I have to talk myself back from the proverbial edge about every other day. I don't mean to sound not excited, because I am. I am thrilled I was able to get pregnant and carry a healthy baby this far. I am happy that my medication and condition hasn't caused any major problems for me or the little guy in my stomach. It is just bing life changing stuff that has me constantly reflecting and questioning every decision I make, or have made, or will make etc. I am having a son....holy crap, a son.
One thing we can be sure about is he has his father's calves. Those of you who know Josh well, know the lore of the calves. The calves that could out you in a wrestling move and pop off your head with a simply flick of his knee. Some have actually deemed them "cows" they are so strong and muscular. Well, it is with those tiny calves that this kid has been kicking non-stop! I don't what the average movement is for a baby at this stage but our little one never stops. All day long, sometimes through the night. I am not eating or drinking any caffeine, so it cannot be blamed on that. I hope he settles down a bit out of the womb or I am afraid I will be chasing this kid everywhere!